October 21, 2008

• crash!

   
  © cRckl

  i have nearly memorized the road between brooklyn and edison now.  three segmented stretches of the bqe, I278 through staten island, and the nj turnpike, all perfectly-punctuated by the verrazano-narrows bridge and the goethals bridge (though technically the goethals bridge is way narrower).  anyway, i've become so comfortable with this route that i don't think twice about whizzing over the bridges.  it's like being en route to grandmother's house.

  last saturday, however, i was given quite a jolt on the verrazano bridge when a car meandered into the left lane in front of me.  i didn't think much of it.  maybe he had an e-z pass and felt like taking advantage of the reserved lane.  except as he was leaning into the left lane, i realized that he was coming in way too steeply and before i knew it, he crashed into the median!  i can't remember exactly how far i was behind him, but i remember bits of the car flying onto the road, and an incredible spray of dust and sand.  what are those medians made out of anyway?

  normally cars zoom through the verrazano bridge, but i remember taking a look in the rearview mirror, and all the cars behind me had practically stopped.  it was dark, but somehow i could see all the drivers with their mouths hanging open, for it wasn't so much that the car crashed on its own, but what happened afterwards.  after the car slammed into the median, it kind of shuddered and then veered across the three lanes of the bridge.  i couldn't see inside the car, but it was almost as if the driver merely shook his head to regain his senses because not a moment afterward, he politely drove into the right lane and continued on his merry way.  it was the vehicular equivalent of falling flat on your face at lunch with your tray in tow, and then coolly walking away as if nothing happened...except that all your lunch is smeared all over the floor, and your hair is totally disheveled...not to mention the blood coming down from your nose.

  the rest of us slowly picked our jaws up and started crawling ahead, but still behind the crashed car, who now had no lights, and no bumper.  in fact, i actually ran over some of the foam from his bumper.  he managed to stay perfectly aligned in the right lane, but no one wanted to pass him.  well, not until this black car came, and weaved through the rest of us at incredible speeds.  i could hear him yell, "what's the matter with all of you slowpokes?!"  that was enough cue to rev up the competition, and the cars started picking up speed again.

  i tried to get a peek inside the car, but i never passed him because he rolled merrily along.  at the toll booth, i saw him roll into an e-z pass booth (i.e. no person was there) and that worried me even more.  was he going to keep driving in that state?  was he drunk?  was he sleepy?  thankfully, i remembered that there was always a cop stationed at the verrazano toll...even at one in the morning, someone is assigned to stand just beyond the toll gate...for what purpose, i do not know.  i looked forward to actually giving him a purpose this time...but of course, the one time i needed him, he was not there. 

  in the midst of looking for the police officer, i lost track of the car, so i decided to call 911 instead...just in case this guy was drunk because the car obviously showed no signs of stopping.  i was worried that he might decide to ram into me later.  but the call was so ridiculous.  i had no license plate number, no other description of the car than, i think it was silver, and it has no lights...the dispatcher said he would call an "assistant" officer, and promptly hung up.  i thought to myself that this must be pretty low-priority to go to an "assistant" officer...but better that then assistant "to" the officer.  (holla holla, dwight!)

  i spent the rest of my trek suscpiciously eyeing my rearview mirror for one-eyed or no-lighted cars.  one actually came up right behind me, but it turned out to be a blue car whose headlight had burned out.  in fact, i couldn't see the crashed car anywhere...it was almost like it vanished in thin air.  still, i can't seem to get the image out of my mind. 

  drive carefully, folks!  in the words of my mama, "you can be the best driver in the world, but it doesn't matter because other people are not!"

  • 7:54 pm
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