November 5, 2008

• the wait...the win

  
  © doug mills

  my excitement did not really break until 11pm last night.  at that point, i had already been to two different polling places, first to vote, then to watch r vote.  i'm glad i ended up in the clinton hill / fort greene area last night.  we had dinner with j and a last night at one of the few restaurants that didn't have a tv - but a had his iTouch, as did the other table of french obama supporters, who even had stylized t-shirts of him on.  our conversation broke several times as the server would come by the table and check a's iTouch screen.  when he reached 203, she woohooed in unrestrained emotion.  some locals filmed an interview outside the window, and we craned our necks to see who they were interviewing...some young college student types clad in obama gear.  when we left the restaurant, we heard the swell of cheers.  the iTouch had not yet updated the results, so we weren't quite sure if he had broken 270.  it wasn't until i yelled up to the man banging on a pot from his 3rd story window that i found out.

  "is it official?"
  "it's official!  WOOOHOOOOO!"

  at the corner, a group of young teenagers yelped and yeehawed as they ran past us.  i wondered if they were even old enough to vote.  it was definitely an all-ages show.  they ran towards the crowds spilling out of the restaurants with huge obama posters and balloons.  i tried to join in, and let out a yelp or two, but i think i was still in shock.  though i had secretly wanted this, i was actually very scared that it would not happen.  during the campaign, i joked that i'd have to leave the country if mccain won, but other than that, i was pretty quiet with my hopes.  when i voted in the morning, i parked next to a car with a mccain sticker, and it unnerved me.  every time i saw a mccain/palin sign on a lawn, my immediate reaction was, "eww!"  so even as i walked into the polling area and sized up the crowd, i couldn't quite tell where my staid suburban compatriots stood.

  when i got to brooklyn, it was much clearer where everyone stood.  there was an "obama"-mobile parked outside r's place, and lots of people wore the iconic t-shirt of obama's face awash in cream, blue and red.  at the polling center, all the walls were covered with booths, and i anxiously watched r's feet as he entered the ancient machine of levers galore.  then it was quiet.  i read up on people getting excited because they had voted, but it was still way too early to get excited about the results.  when i checked around 6, only 8% of nj was reporting, and it was a tight race which unnerved me again.

  i guess the last election was like a bad breakup with a boyfriend.  it scarred me, and left me quite skeptical and unwilling to be exuberant.  even as i drove home and listened to obama's acceptance speech, i felt a cautious swell of emotion.  this is indeed historic, but either i'm still in shock, or there's a part of me that's still a little skeptical.  one side of me is ecstatic - wondering of all the new possibilities the new presidency will hold...but another side of me is extremely nervous.  like i'm glad that obama is now president-elect because it means he's entitled to secret service detail (though i heard his current security detail is quite stellar).  as brian lehrer debriefed the acceptance speech, he hung momentarily on the parallel of barack's allusion to mlk jr's speech, right before he was assassinated...and it actually scared me.

  but if anything, this campaign slowly drew me back out of my political shell.  i was ecstatic to see so many people so excited to vote.  the volunteerism was incredible.  the re-enfranchising of the historically disenfranchised was heartening.  and it seems like people are learning that government cannot be passive.  the election blazoned a striking message - "george w, we hate what you've done and we want you and your people outta here!"  but more importantly, it was a self-chastising shout to ourselves, the voters.  "i will no longer be passive about my government, but i will take responsibility for it!"  and the extreme practicality of obama's speech lended to that same theme - it may take a year, it may take a term, but change will happen. (can anyone find the exact quote?)  i guess the question is, america, will you be committed to that change?

  i hope so.

  • 8:57 am
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